Beauty is the Beast
by JenInspired20
Summary: Beastboy is starting to spiral further into his depression but an unlikely person comes along to lift him up and give him a new outlook on life and with that comes a romantic chaos and an abundance of angsty drama! R&R BB/? BB/Robin
1. Prelude

Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans or any of the characters, Please Read and Review this is my first yaoi hope you enjoy!

Prelude 

It was a sad realization to come to especially after so many years of deluding myself, but what choice did I have? I couldn't just accept who I was….who I am and not be eternally damned to sadness. Even worse I couldn't accept it and slowly lose my humanity. Oh but there were so many times I had thought about it just to be free of the torture of pretending, I was tired of it but I couldn't find the strength to do it, to let them see that I Beastboy was just as weak as they thought I was. I had no choice but to smile and bear the weight of their ridicule and contempt. What was even worse I had dared to fall in love with a man, a man I would never have, on top of which he was in love with someone I couldn't even compete with. Starfire, the undisputed beauty of the team was someone I desperately wanted to be and yet someone I held so much loathing for it hurt to even hear her voice. What good would it do though to hate her and want to be her at the same time there was nothing I could do, I couldn't, WOULDN'T lash out at her. So once again my only choice was to smile and hate myself for adding more weight to my pile of issues.

I could only wish for the feeling of being normal, the feeling of being loved and wanted and not constantly feel like I was this annoying stain they couldn't get rid of. Wishes rarely come true though and wishes seemed to only come true to the beautiful ones. This sad realization I had stumbled on, I also wish I would never have stumbled upon it and just be happy with my delusions of grandeur but alas all good things, even things that aren't exactly good must come to an end….


	2. A Possible Miracle

Beware! I am making Beastboy act a little different than he does in the cartoon, he's more serious and less silly now but I will try to keep the other characters true tho their personalities! just bare with me , also Robin now Nightwing is 17, Cyborg is 19, Raven and Starfire are also 17 and Beastboy is 16 soon to be 17.

A Possible Miracle

"Good morning friend Beastboy, shall I prepare the tofu breakfast for you!" I fought back a cringe as I was greeted by the ever cheery voice of Starfire, walking over to the kitchenette in the living room I managed to muster up a tired smile and greet her. "Morning Star, ummm don't worry about making breakfast for me ok." I inwardly shuddered at the thought of eating her poisonous cooking and began to pull out my own special food from the refrigerator preparing to cook my own breakfast.

"Are you sure, I would not mind cooking the tofu scramble for you?" she asked. I knew she genuinely wanted to do a nice gesture for me but I couldn't help but feel annoyed with her kindness.

"Thanks Star, but I'm good."

"If you insist dear friend !" and with that she cheerily began preparing her own strange tameranean breakfast. Not too long after that Raven hovered in. I did not expect a greeting from her nor did I intend to give her one knowing that she would not reply and only hover Indian style in her usual corner to meditate. In the beginning I had often pestered her for attention and in doing so was stung with harsh sarcasm and in time after so many lashings learned to be silent and appreciate silence as well.

"Mornin Y'all!" it was hard to mistake who walked in next, Cyborg the biggest and tallest member of our team also our resident engineer walked over to the kitchen to make himself breakfast seeing as my vegetarian lifestyle was unsatisfactory for him.

"Yo BB your taking up space in the kitchen, you almost done with your tofu man?" I sighed and hurridly finished making my breakfast.

"All yours Cy." I sat down quietly at the little island and began eating my breakfast, soon after that I heard footsteps approaching, the heat rose to my face instantly as I watched 'Nightwing' or rather Dick Grayson enter into the room.

"Morning everyone." he greeted, clad in only his pajama pants, mask and not much else he strolled over to the kitchen exuding cool confidence only he could master being completely shirtless and all.

"Good Mor-"

"Good Morning, I trust you slept well last night!" Starfire greeted with loud excitement, and in doing so cut me off but this wasn't new, he probably liked her greeting him in the morning more anyways...

"I slept well thanks Star." he said with a gentle smile. Nightwing sat down at the island in between Starfire and I and was passed his breakfast by Cyborg who usually volunteered to make breakfast for him and the others since I was the only one who ate differently, aside from Starfire of course.

"We haven't had much crime to fight in the past few weeks so I think this would be a great time for everyone to take a break." Dick said suddenly. Cyborg instantly started to grin from ear to ear, I knew he had been wanting to have a break for awhile now if only to visit his Titans East sweetheart Bumblebee.

"Oh ya thats what i'm talking about!"

"Oh how glorious, we have not had a break in such a long while!"

"Cool..."

Dick chuckled at his team and stood up taking his empty plate to the sink. "I figured you guys would like that, so what do you guys plan to do today?" he asked

"Well you know me, I'm gonna go visit my baby down at Titans east!" Cyborg said practically brimming with excitement.

"I suppose I can go shopping with Starfire, but we're stopping at the bookstore." Raven said only to be answered with a 'tee hee' by an excited Starfire.

"I think i'm gonna go visit Bats and the others how bout you Beastboy?" I jumped a little a the sudden acknowledgement and blushed lightly.

"Umm I don't know guess i'll go down to the arcade." I lied ever since I had turned 16 I had just lost all intrest in video games, in all actuality I had found myself adopting some of Ravens ways, I started reading more although they weren't gloomy books like hers, they were just regular fiction novels ranging from all different types of genre's I didn't particularily have a favorite. The titans of course didn't notice these subtle changes aside from the fact that I stopped making up stupid jokes.

"Cool, well guess I should start getting ready." Dick said and started heading out of the room.

"Oh so should we as well Raven!" Starfire instanly grabbed raven and started flying a little haphazardly towards her room and Ravens, Raven yelling at her all the while.

"Guess i'll get ready too." Cyborg said with a small smile and headed towards his room leaving me alone in the living room.

I wasn't in much of a hurry since I had plenty of time to go visit the 'arcade' so I just opted to wash some of the few dishes in the sink and watch some tv.

* * *

><p>After all the titans had left I had decided to walk around the park. Seeing as it was the middle of fall and it was a little chilly outside I wore a light sweater, some baggy black jeans and an old dark brown jacket that Dick had given me last year.<p>

Walking through the park I had, had to endure some stares and whispers but it wasn't something I was un-used to, so I continued to blindly walk on along the concrete path, whilst doing so I began to get lost in my thoughts, which I knew was a dangerous place to get lost in sometimes. an overwhelming feeling of depression waved upon me and I started to feel like I was trapped, constricted and wanting to break free. I started thinking about what would happen if I just decided to leave and never come back, the titans wouldn't miss me and they would just find someone to replace me soon enough. I had nowhere to go though, I didn't have another home to call my own, sure I could have gone back to the Doom Patrol but that would be just defeating the purpose. I couldn't go anywhere without being noticed and thats all I wanted, to just go somewhere and not worry about saving someone or being looked at like some sort of freak, I wanted to be the human I was supposed to be. I wanted to be Garfield Logan, not Beastboy.

Being so locked in my thoughts I hadn't noticed that I was about to walk into someone.

"Oof, oh excuse me I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention!" I looked up at the person I had bumped into and found myself staring at him. The boy was about my age or maybe older and was certainly good looking. He had dark green eyes and shaggy black hair that barely touched his shoulders, he was a littler taller than me, probably the same height as Dick Grayson, and with the way his sweater fitted him you could definetly tell he had some muscle underneath that clothing.

"It's ok, s'not everyday you get to run into a superhero like this." he said with a slight chuckle.

Finding myself at a lost for words, I continued to stare at him, I wasn't sure if I was just starstruck or so socially inept from regular people that I didn't know how to respond, I noticed him raise his eyebrow at me curiously than suddenly smirk.

"It's not everyday a superhero checks me out either, I suppose I should be flattered though huh?" snapping out of my daze, I frowned a little and averted my gaze to the ground with a slight blush.

"Sorry...again, umm I should get going." quickly, I tried to walk on past him but he suddenly grabbed me instantly putting me on the defensive.

"Whoa, don't go all crime fighter on me, I just wanted to ask a simple question." I sighed and calmed myself a little and lightly pulled my arm from his grasp.

"Well, whats your question?" I asked.

"Do you wanna hang out with me?" he asked simply with a slight grin on his face, my eyes widened and I couldn't help but stare at him again but this time with an incredulous look.

"Are you- I mean, how can you just...No?" I was a little unsure of what to think of that, I'm sure any one of my super hero fellows would probably have been a little suprised at his boldness.

"No? Why not?" either he must not have been from around here or he was just extremely bold, the look of genuine confusion on his face was a little unnerving.

"it's not exactly superhero protocol be hanging out with civilians we don't even know." I said.

"What, it's not like I'm a villian or anything, and besides before you bumped into me you looked a little down." I blushed, so not only was he observant he was also extremely bold, not to mention now that I think about it, he might have bumped into me on purpose.

"Hm, and how would I know your not a villian and if you noticed me looking 'down', I'm sure you also noticed that i was about to bump into you and I'm sure you could have moved out of the way in time, which leaves me to think you tried to bump into me on purpose." I stared blankly at him putting my defenses up.

"Great deductive skills, yes I did bump into you on purpose but I only wanted an excuse to talk to you, trust me I'm not someone you need to worry about." a nervous grin spread across his face, as he held his hands up slightly in surrender.

"Why would you want to talk to me?" I asked not yet letting my guard down.

"Heh, well I'm a little bit of a fan is all and I thought hey why not ask him to hang out." a nervous laugh escaped his lips and I began to soften up a little.

"You are extremely bold, but I don't thi-"

"Please, whats the harm in just walking through the park together?" he pleaded and I sighed knowing deep down that I shouldn't do what I'm about to do but it was hard to refuse someone who looked the way he did.

"I suppose we could walk around for a bit..." I said, I rolled my eyes a little at the triumphant grin on his face and began walking with him.

As we walked I found out his name was Jason Todd which sounded vaguely familair but I couldn't exactly place my finger on why, so I just ignored the feeling and continued talking with him, he was nothing short of confident a little ballsy at times but he knew his boundries. I learned that he was 18 and adopted by a pretty wealthy man and worked with his company for a short while until he decided to move to Jump city for educational oppurtunities, he worked some odd jobs around the city but I didn't really asked what kinds.

I was truly enjoying myself for the first time in a long time, and I was please to find we had alot in common from books to music to certain ideals. I was enjoying myself so much that I hadn't noticed that it had gotten dark on us.

"Wow look at the time, we've been talking for hours." I said as I looked up at one of the street clocks.

"Ya...So I guess this is it then?" Jason said with a dissapointed smile.

"If you want we can meet up again, were on break for a couple days and I don't have anything to do." I said with a little hope in my voice.

"That would be awesome, how about we meet up here at 1:00!" I chuckled at his eagerness, and felt a little releived he wanted to see me again. "Sure, I'll meet you here at 1:00 then." I said.

"Great, it was nice meeting you Beastboy, I'll see you tommorow." he lifted my hand and kissed it and my face went competely red but before I could even say anything about it he was already walking away. I shook my head to snap myself out of an oncoming daze and turned myself into a hawk and flew back home.

When I got there I noticed that Starfire and Raven had come back from their shopping trip, Raven was already in her room but Starfire stayed up a little later and was watching tv in the living room.

"Beastboy, you are home, I was beginning to think you had been kidnapped!" I looked at the time and noticed it was exactly 12:00 midnight.

"I'm fine Star, I just lost track of time." she came over and hugged me tightly and I could feel the anger rising in my chest, I knew she was only being her kind self but the jealousy in my heart would not go away, despite all that though I hugged her back reassuringly and we both retired to our rooms for the night.

As I lay in my bed I kept thinking about Jason Todd, I couldn't help but think that continuing to see him could possibly blow up in my face. The rule that superheros could not form relationships with civilians in that way was set in place for a reason, but I felt like if I didn't explore this, I could possibly be loosing someone I could finally and genuinely hold dear. Miracles happened rarely and maybe God had finally decided to give me one, and who am I to spit in the face of miracle...

Yay so my first chapter is done what do you think, please Review and try not be to harsh folks! I will definetly try to update soon.


	3. The Beauty

The Beauty

Watching the clock, waiting for 1 o'clock to strike was painful, it seemed like the time barely moved forward, and I was beginning to wonder if there had been something wrong with the clocks.

"You seem anxious Beastboy." Raven said while glancing up at me from one of her may spell books.

"Just a little bored is all." I replied nervousness laced in every word. The last thing I had wanted was for her to know what I was doing, especially when it involved a 'civilian'.

"Then why don't you go do something, instead of staring at the clock, are you waiting for something?" I bit my lip as I saw her raise her eyebrow in suspicion. If she wanted she could have read my mind for answers, but she had promised long ago that she would not invade our minds and snoop around our personal thoughts, but it was hard to say when she was reading our minds and if she was really keeping her promise or leading us on.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw that the time had turned to 12:50, and although it would not take me long to reach the park, I needed any excuse to leave Raven's sight.

"They installed a new game at the arcade and it doesn't open up till about 1:00, and seeing as how it's almost 1 now I should get going, later, don't wait up!" and with that I bolted out of the door before she could get a chance to utter a word

* * *

><p>By the time I had reached the park I was surprised to find Jason already waiting for me. I had discreetly landed behind a big tree and changed back into my more human form. Jogging over to him I had proceeded to greet him but I stopped short when I had noticed he had been lightly sleeping sitting up on the park bench.<p>

I smiled to myself as I watched him sleep for awhile, he was of course handsome when he was awake but he was even more so when he was asleep, in an angelic way of course. I looked over to one of the street clocks and realized I was about 3 minutes early, I figured it wouldn't be too much of a problem if I at least let him sleep for a few more minutes. I quietly sat next to him on the bench and took in my surroundings. Not many people had been out walking around due to the weather but I was relieved I would not get so many stares this time, despite it being a little chilly it was a beautiful day the wind blew the fallen leaves around making them dance around in lovely swirls and twirls, and even the sky seemed to smile gracefully upon me this day.

"Beautiful day isn't it." Nearly jumping out of my skin I looked over to the owner of that voice and noticed that he was now wide awake.

"Sorry If I woke you." I said a little nervously, he simply smiled, shook his head and yawned. "You didn't wake me, besides I should be sorry that I wasn't awake to greet you." I blushed at his politeness, the way he spoke to me made my heart flutter a little and it was nice to have this feeling without a negative reaction following it.

"It's ok, you looked…..peaceful and I felt it would be rude to wake you." I said, a slight smile spreading across my face he chuckled at me and suddenly leaned over and laid his head on my shoulder. The heat instantly rose to my face and I turned away hoping he wouldn't see.

"D-don't you think this is extremely inappropriate!"

"Hmm you're asking me what I think, well in that case I don't think it's inappropriate at all, in fact I think it's extremely appropriate." I could hear the mirth in his voice and see it just as well in his eyes when I turned to face him.

"Just how do you figure that pray tell!" I yelled turning redder by the second the more he snuggled closer to me.

"Well who better to snuggle against, than my favorite super hero?" I watched him bite back a smirk and I pouted, squirming around on the park bench.

"Would you please get off?" I felt bad about asking him to do so, in some way I felt as if I was being mean or yelling at him, but his closeness was making me uneasy. I had never received such closeness, maybe from Rita but even still it was rare with Mento watching over us like a seedy vulture.

I felt him slowly move away, and I couldn't help but feel as if I had insulted him, this was my one chance at a miracle and I was pushing it away like some ungrateful brat. In less than a few seconds a dark shadow had began to hover over my 'beautiful day' it was a desperate struggle to keep from sinking deeper into this panic and struggle I was creating.

Suddenly as if electricity had jolted me Jason's laugh rang through my ears and mercifully grabbed me from my sinking hole.

"Sorry, this would just be another one of those moments where Jason crosses the line, sometimes I have to wonder if I have ADHD or something." He continued to laugh lightly and he ruffled my hair with a reassuring smile.

"Hey sorry, I promise no more touchy feely….sort of." he said as he raised his right hand in a pledging manner.

"Sort of?" I blushed, feeling slightly overwhelmed, he unraveled me and yet made me whole again in a matter of seconds with such simple actions.

"Well it's kinda in my nature to be a little touchy feely you know, can't help myself but I promise to practice more self control when I'm with you." I stared at him for a bit and averted my eyes to the ground.

"You make it sound as if we'll keep seeing each other." I said.

"We will I'm sure of it, even if your break only last a couple of days I'm sure we will keep bumping into each other, fate and destiny have a funny way of doing that you know?" I stared at him with a sad hope and yet my mind was bewildered with his optimism. Jason was someone I was not used to and the thought of getting the chance to merely adjust to him ways was both thrilling and terrifying.

"I don't get you Jason Todd….." I said more to myself than to anyone in particular, he chuckled at that and stood up and stretched.

"Most people don't Beastboy, but you'll learn to understand me soon enough." He looked down and smiled brilliantly at me as I sat, still on the park bench, his eyes still held that same mirth but there was something more there that I couldn't quite tell but I was sure as he had said that I would learn to in time.

* * *

><p>(Time skip to a couple hours later, yeah I know a little weird right?)<p>

With much convincing Jason had led me out of the park and into the city (so much for not wanting people to stare.) self consciously I had pulled the hood of my jacket over my head although I knew that wouldn't do much good.

"Don't worry, were going to a pretty secluded place so not many people will stare." I sighed already getting used to another one of Jason's 'Don't worries.' We walked through the crowd a few minutes more till he led me down an alleyway, being a superhero and all you learn to be highly skeptical of alleyways and such but I put my trust in him and followed anyway, minutes later we came upon a shabby bookstore, that looked like it hadn't gotten much business in years and yet it was still up and running.

We walked in and I looked around, although it looked pretty run down on the outside it looked pretty quaint on the inside.

"What are we doing at a bookstore?" I asked, I had suspected this would be the last place Jason would take me.

"Well you mentioned you like books, and they sell theirs pretty cheap, besides they got all the classics and it's pretty nice and quiet here don't you think?"

I nodded, although it was not what I had been expecting, I still thought it was better than being at the park all day or walking through the city.

We began to explore the shelves and I had picked up so many books that, I finally had to set them down on the table; Jason had been already sitting there reading.

"What are you reading?" I asked trying to look over at the title that his hand was now covering.

"My favorite book, Beauty and the Beast." He said, instantly I sneered and fought back violent recoil, I hated that story it brought back cruel memories and it was also a cruel reminder of just how unfair my own life was. I stared at the book with pure disgust and my heart started to boil over with anger, malicious laughter played in my head and nearly drowned out the sound of Jason calling my name.

"Beastboy?"

"I hate that book."

I said it before I could even stop myself but I knew deep down I didn't want to, it was as if another voice took over and it was much more direct, much more intense, and much angrier.

Jason simply frowned and stared down at his book for a second before fixing me with a confused look.

"I don't see why, it kind of reminds me of you actually." That malicious laughter started to mock me again and I glared wildly at him.

"Is this your idea of a joke…?" I growled, clenching my fist fighting hard to keep them by my side as the laughter continued to grow louder.

I watched his body language melt into an indifferent state and his eyes cast something that seemed like pity, maybe understanding, it was hard to tell, I was beginning to seethe with rage as he continued to stare at me. No words escaped his lips and the silence seemed to make the laughing that much stronger, I wanted to attack Jason, I wanted to hurt him badly, I could even imagine myself doing it. It was strange like being a spectator watching from the sidelines, watching a beast wait for his master to move his thumb down and sentence the unlucky fool to death, but there was more than one master…..more than one judge waiting to watch the scene unfold.

"If I was going to poke fun at you, it wouldn't be like this." Mischievous amusement laced his voice, his features, and the world seem to grow black in a second, like a T.V cutting off during the climax of a movie, when I came to myself I had found myself on the floor books strewn around me, and the one book I hated most lay perfectly on the table unharmed. I thrashed and screamed not realizing that I was being held down, at the moment all I wanted was to tear apart that accursed book.

"STOP IT, DO YOU THINK DESTROYING A BOOK WILL WASH EVERYTHING AWAY!" I looked up and I realized it was Jason holding me down, but for a split second it almost felt like I was staring into the face of Nightwing instead, it was so strange so surreal, hard to believe that this was happening and yet my body kept thrashing, but this time tears and sobs followed instead of angry growls and screams. It went on like that for who knew how long but my body finally settled down and I was starting to come back to my senses.

"Whoever read you the book, obviously didn't read it to you properly, you're not just playing the Beast in this story, you're the beauty as well." When I looked into Jason's eyes it felt like I had been looking into them for the first time, and just like the first time I had been stunned.

"Beastboy-" before he could say much more I quickly pushed him off of me, I ran and didn't dare to look back, as I ran the events that happened in such a short time seem to rush back to me, I didn't want to think about what just happened, what it meant now that Jason saw me at my lowest point, I just wanted to escape for now. I had ran all the way till I reached the outside of titans tower, I needed to regain my composure, I needed to replace my mask and act as if nothing was wrong. _Just like you've rehearsed Gar…..just like you rehearsed. _

I walked in with a bright cheery smile, chatted animatedly with Starfire about my 'newly achieved high score' at the arcade, and then just like every other day we sat down and ate and soon nightfall descended upon us. I said my 'goodnights and sweet dreams.' With a tired smile and a yawn. _Just like I rehearsed_.

Finally into my room I went, and it was a miracle I made it to the bed at all before I collapsed, and tried to fight the sleep begging to close my eyes. I soon succumbed to nightmarish slumber but even that was better than the nightmare of reality I would face tomorrow.

So what do you think, personally I think it was a little rushed but I was in the moment, there is definetly more drama to come, hope you enjoyed Chapter 3 please Review!


	4. The Cage

_Disclaimer: I once again do not own any of the characters in this story also I would like to apologize for the long wait, school and finals you guys know the drill, anyway I hope you like this next chapter please leave reviews, Also in the next chapter to come I will be addressing every character by their real names rather than their Superhero and or villian !_

The Cage

_/"Garfield, it is time you abandon these foolish fairytales, no one will ever love you, NO ONE, except for me of course."_

_Sick laughter echoed through his mind like a loud bell._

"_No one except for me can ever love a beast like you, you are a monster to them, an abomination that should be killed, but I know better, just like every other beast in this world, they can all be tamed, with the right training that is…"/_

"Beastboy, Beastboy wake up!" I groaned as Raven's voice cut through my dreams, I was so exhausted I didn't even want to open my eyes but Raven was persistent, I hoped that maybe if I kept my eyes closed and didn't answer her she would go away but she began to shake me so hard that I thought for sure if I had let her continue she'd pull something out of place.

"What do you want Raven!" I snapped and smacked her hands away from my arms, I sat up in my bed and composed myself, finally I looked up at her with an annoyed glare and she merely rolled her eyes and sat down beside me. Raven sat silently for awhile with that ever grim look on her face but when I really looked at her she looked just as exhausted as I felt, she also had this disturbed look in her eyes as if she saw something she wasn't supposed to see.

"Beastboy…..Garfield I." I was shocked to say the least she rarely ever used my real name and when she did it was rarely ever in a casual manner. We sat in silence for what seemed like hours and the longer she stayed silent the more nervous I became I prayed that whatever she had to say had nothing to do with Jason.

"Garfield I'm so sorry…" she chocked out and began to sob, I was nothing more than taken aback as I watched the tears fall from her eyes, I was also very much confused, what was she suddenly so sorry for? I placed my hand gently on her back and tried to calm her down enough to get her to explain.

"Raven, I don't understand, what are you sorry for?" she looked at me with such sadness that it was making my heartache, she suddenly pulled me into a tight hug and I could do nothing more but let her hold me until she finally decided to speak.

"I-I saw into your mind, I didn't mean to, I saw what he did to you please don't be angry with me Garfield I lost control of my powers and your emotions were so strong, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry!" I felt as if my world was falling to pieces all around me, everything I had worked so hard to suppress she saw, she saw my darkest memories, memories I wanted to die with me in my grave and she saw them in just one night.

"Y-you saw, you saw everything?" It was more of a question than a statement; I hoped that she really hadn't seen EVERYTHING. Raven finally started to calm down and wipe her tears away, but it was hard for her to go back to that same indifferent composure she carried from day to day.

"Not everything, there were some things you kept locked away, that I was unable to see, but Gar some of the memories you kept locked were opened and with them…..and with them came a personality, do you remember the time you and Cyborg went into my mind and you saw all my different emotional personalities, well it was the same for you but they carried memories with them…..dark ones, there was one that spoke to me."

My heart was practically beating out of my chest, different personas, IN MY MIND; I was starting to become afraid of myself.

"What do you mean spoke to you, how can I have different personas in my mind I'm not even aware of, I don't understand." The more her words were beginning to settle in the more frantic I became.

"Gar please calm down and listen to me, it isn't uncommon for people to have emotions but it is uncommon when their emotions become personalities, with their own thoughts….their own ideals, you were probably never aware because at first they were just that, emotions, but when some of your suppressed memories were set free they blended together to create a personality, and as I said before I spoke to one of them, Douleur, which is the French word for…"

"Pain…." I answered, her eyes widened for a second but she didn't try to ask me how I knew what that word meant, and thankfully I was glad she didn't

"What did this other me say…" she frowned and fidgeted with her cloak for a bit before she spoke again, and I wondered if the other me had really been so daunting as to make Raven so nervous.

"He said that there were others like him but that they were locked away, he also mentioned some others but they never showed themselves, Douleur also said that he wishes to give Jason his thanks….."My heart stopped when she said Jason's name, how much did this other me say, did he tell her all about what happened yesterday.

"Garfield who is this Jason person?" she asked. I couldn't answer her, I wasn't sure what she would do if I told her about Jason, if I told her about yesterday, she would probably perceive him as a threat,(that is if she didn't see him as a threat already) and maybe he was but something inside me didn't want to let him go, there was something about him that made me feel like I needed him, maybe it was _Douleur _talking but either way I couldn't let Raven take him away, and knowing Raven she would, and she would do it without hesitation.

"Gar you're not answering me, who is Jason?" she glared sternly at me, I wondered for a split second if she would delve into my mind to get the answer but I doubted that, whatever she saw in my mind last night it obviously scared her enough to stay out, if not for awhile anyway.

"I….don't know who that is." I answered her finally.

"You're lying."

"I'm not lying; I told you I don't know who this Jason is."

"Stop lying Gar, I know you're protecting him, this person could be a threat to you, to the titans!"

"He isn't a threat!" I blurted, I had just busted myself, and it was now becoming even harder to keep Jason a secret.

"I'm asking you one last time Gar, who is he."

We stared each other down hard for what seemed like hours, no one spoke, but I could tell Raven was losing her patience with me.

"He's no one you need to concern yourself with." I said, Raven growled and clenched her fist in frustration.

"He could be a threat Gar!"

"He isn't a threat!"

Before she could continue to yell at me, my door swooshed open and their standing in the doorway was Nightwing.

"Who isn't or is a threat?" I bit my lip and glanced over at Raven with a pleading look, I hoped she wouldn't tell Nightwing of the memories she saw or my different personas.

"One of you will have to answer me, and I prefer you do it quickly." He narrowed his eyes at us both, and I averted my gaze to the floor.

"Beastboy is hiding someone that could possibly be a threat, all I know is his name and nothing else…" I turned to Raven and glared at her and then turned my attention to Nightwing.

"That isn't true I'm not hiding anyone!"

"Then why won't you tell me who he is!"

"BECAUSE IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" I was so angry, so annoyed why wouldn't she just drop it, she already went into my mind now she just had to continue to pry, and now Nightwing, Starfire, and Cyborg were all staring at me with a suspicious looks.

"Beastboy come with me, we need to talk." Nightwing merely motioned for me to follow and left the room; I growled in frustration but followed him anyway. We walked down the hall until we got down to his room, the door swooshed open and he motioned for me to step inside, I glanced at him hesitantly for a second before walking in, I didn't try to take in my surroundings, I'd been in his room a couple of times before, but never for an interrogation, I kept my eyes firmly planted to the floor and waited for him to speak.

"Beastboy, Garfield look at me." I clenched my fist and grit my teeth; he NEVER called me by my real name never until now, and right now him saying it for the first time left a sour taste in my mouth, I had longed for years for him to say my name, to acknowledge me, but never like this.

"Don't call me that…."

"Call you what, Garfield I'm just saying your na-

"I SAID DON'T!" he stepped back a little in surprise but then quickly regained his composure, he stayed silent and for awhile the only thing I could hear was my heart beating in my chest and the sound of harsh breathing….my breathing.

"I just…don't like the way you say my name." the truth was, I didn't really like it when anyone said it, maybe Rita of course but still my name, when spoken by others it sounded foreign, like a dirty curse word you weren't supposed to say.

"I'm sorry I'll continue to call you Beastboy then." I nodded and continued to stare at the floor, he sighed and I could hear him stepping closer to me, he cautiously but gently placed his right hand on my shoulder, than used the other hand to tilt my face up and look at him. It sent a shiver down my spine, him touching me like this, a part of me just wanted to enjoy it the other part of me wanted to fight him off, this moment reminded me of Jason and how I felt when he touched me, I loved it and I hated it all at the same time.

"Beastboy you need to tell me what's going on, tell me who this Jason is, if Raven believes this person could be a harm to you I need to investigate before things start getting worse. Let me help you." I didn't need help, I didn't want help with anything, I was fine, and all I wanted was for them to leave me alone.

"I don't need help, I just want to be left alone."

"That isn't an option Beastboy, Raven is obviously worried about you for a reason, and the more you try to hide from me, the more suspicious I become, I'll ask you one last time to tell me who _Jason_ is." I bit my lip nervously, and suddenly that gentle touch didn't feel so gentle or inviting, it felt like I had just walked into a trap.

"He's just a civilian..." I answered

"What is his last name, what does he look like?" he was staring me down hard from what I could tell with the mask covering his eyes, and being in the position that we were in, he made it hard to look away.

"I don't know his last name, I only met him a couple of days ago at the arcade." I lied and proceeded to give him a fake description of Jason's physical features, I wasn't sure if he believed it or not but it seemed as if that was enough for him for now.

"Beastboy I don't like having to do this to you, but you are to stay in the tower unless there is a mission or until I say otherwise, If you do leave the tower without my permission, _I will come find_ you, and If I have to do that...you will not like the outcome." I glared hard at him as he walked past me and to the door, without another word.

"Y-you can't do this, this isn't fair I-"

"You can leave now Beastboy..." his posture was indifferent yet rigid, he did not look me in the eye, and it seemed as if he felt no regrets about making me a prisoner in what I thought was my home. I didn't utter a word after that and silently left his room, I could feel his eyes on my back as I continued down the hall, my ears twitched as his doors swooshed closed.

I could sense Raven and the other waiting at the end of the hall for me, and when I reached them I did not speak I merely kept walking, i heard them call after me and soon realized my steps became more fast paced, and soon I shot out into a run and I was heading towards the exit/entrance to the tower.

"_This is insane."_ I thought, I was running away from the man who gave me a home, I was running away from friends.

/_"Your running away from your cage."/ I_ heard the voice just as clear and loud in my head as if the owner was standing right in front of me, it sounded like my voice and yet it didn't, it sounded more eloquent, so matter of fact, it was devoid of emotions, if nonchalance had a voice, I figured it would sound like this one.

"BEASTBOY!" I jumped when I heard Nightwings voice bellow through the hall, I was afraid, but I couldn't stop running, I was so close to the door.

/_"He'll catch you, you know, and who's to say he won't beat you for being so disobedient, you could save yourself some __pain__ if you would just comply with masters wishes."/_

I stopped and fell to my knees as a flash of painful memories went through my mind, I felt my stomach lurch and I clutched my stomach, I wanted to scream, but nothing came out, I wanted to move but I couldn't. I could hear a slur of noises, I didn't care to make out what they said I just wanted the memories to stop and the sick feeling in my stomach to disappear.

Somewhere during that time I blacked out and found myself once again reliving nightmarish memories, memories I had long since locked away in the dark recesses of my mind.

_(Narrators POV)_

_"He didn't come to see you today." A dark velvety voice echoed through the warehouse, accompanied with the sounds of footsteps as another voice joined it._

_"He just needs a little time, he'll come see me soon enough." The owner of the second voice stepped into the dim light and revealed a young man with shaggy black hair and dark piercing green eyes. _

_"I hope so for your sake….." a threat was laced in every word as the first voice spoke, the young man stood firm and defiant and answered with a chuckle._

_"Don't worry Slade, fate and destiny have a funny way of working things out."_


	5. Escape

_Sorry for the long wait guys, finals and holidays can get you busy. Hope you enjoy the next chapter, I'll try not to be so long updating next time._

_/"Oh, Ma Petite Bête* do not cry, tears are unbefitting for one such as you, come now growl for me Ma Petite Bête, come on just a little growl for your master?"/_

_It was that voice and that sick laughter again. Faint sobs and a gurgling sound could be heard as well._

_/"That's it, Ma Petite Bête, just a little louder!" the sobs and the gurgling faded as a low pained growl echoed through the room. "Mm I suppose that's good enough for now little beast, although next time I'll expect more from you…."/_

A fragment of my memory played through my mind, repeating itself like a broken record. I felt disgusted, with myself, and everyone around me. Anger seemed to bubble up inside me and cool down at odd moments of the day. That was to be expected though seeing as how I was locked in my room….my cage so to speak. It was just my luck that my room happened to have no windows for me to fly out of or escape and maybe that was on purpose. Usually when one wants to keep his/her pet they lock it in a cage to keep it from tearing up the house or escaping in general. Maybe this was planned I was there pet and I couldn't be trusted no matter how human I acted.

/_"Your melodrama is exhausting, if you had just been obedient you wouldn't have been locked away, Nightwing would have patted you on the head and given you a treat for your obedience, but even after all these years you still haven't taken to your training."/_

"Whose side are you on?" I asked simply to my other self…..Douleur. It had been about a week since that day I tried to escape and I had quickly adapted to my other persona. Douleur didn't speak all the time but every time he did it was accompanied with a memory, and the words he spoke left me confused and annoyed.

_/"I'm on your side of course."_/ he said. I scoffed at that, how could he possibly be on my side when he wanted me to bow down and lick my 'masters' feet.

_/"I only want what's best for you….for us, if you comply to masters wishes the pain will be easier to swallow./_

"Easier to swallow…..I must be a masochist then because complying isn't an option, when the opportunity comes, I'll escape from here."

_/"Very well then…if you do happen to escape though, where will you go…to Jason I presume?"/_

"That would be an option."

"You're trying to give me a headache aren't you?" I glanced over to find raven standing near the door, since I didn't hear the door 'swish' open I assumed she had 'phased' her way through. I glared at her for a second before returning my attention back to the wall.

"Why do you bother coming in here to talk to me when you know how much I hate you right now, unless you plan on letting me go then I don't want to hear what you have to say." Raven was silent for awhile, then she fidgeted for a bit and when I finally glanced over at her again she was walking towards me, she stopped only a few feet away from me when my posture became defensive.

"I didn't mean for this to happen Gar….I only wanted to protect you…." My heart ached at the sadness in her voice but I refused to let go of my anger towards her. If she hadn't of pried I wouldn't be in this predicament!

"Well your weak attempt at '_protection'_ has only resulted in my imprisonment." I spat, I glared hatefully at her and once again I felt as if I was on the outside looking in. That voice that demeanor I displayed was so foreign to me; it felt as if it was someone else controlling me but I couldn't continue to lie to myself that WAS me.

"Gar please…" before she could finish what she was saying the alarms sounded, I merely turned over in my bed and faced the wall again. I wouldn't be charging out into battle with my 'comrades' this time, so why bother getting excited about it. I heard Raven sigh as she left my room, the alarms soon went off and all was silent again….somewhat silent anyways.

/Nightwing's POV/

A whole week had gone by and Gar-Beastboy still wasn't talking. When I would enter into his room he would either glare at me or stare at the wall, on other occasions when the interrogation got heated he would just stare at me with such sadness as if to say.

"Why are you doing this to me?" he would look at me as if I had betrayed him and that look would make the guilt I already felt for locking him away intensify. Why couldn't he just see that I was doing this to protect him, to protect the team! He's still too young to understand I guess…God what am I saying. In all honesty I knew that Beastboy was a lot smarter than he let on, he's shown his abilities more than once and maybe that's what makes me skeptical of him, that and the fact that I just don't know him. I thought Raven was mysterious but Beastboy was on another level. He told us some things about his past like his time with the Doom Patrol and how he went from being a human to what he is today.

But he never really told us anything else besides that. Raven had told me of the multiple personas he had and she mentioned that she saw some of his memories but no matter how hard I pushed her she wouldn't reveal what she saw or to be more precise what she's still seeing. I was surprised at this, I foolishly believed I knew all there was to know about Beastboy but once again he's proven me wrong and that scares me and yet intrigues me at the same time. I want to know more about Beastboy but with the way things are going now I think that I will never get that chance.

It was Monday and I still hadn't found a clue on who this Jason person was, of course and I had noticed the team getting distracted lately, with our 5th member not being able to join us, our battles had gotten a lot harder it was a wonder we came out victorious at all. I had been forced to schedule harder and longer training sessions not only to get us back on top but to keep the team from thinking to hard about the situation at hand. This was extremely hard when it came to Raven, I was sure that Raven had been feeling more guilt about this than anyone especially since she knew secrets about Beastboy she wasn't supposed to know.

Raven, if not training would sleep or meditate more often than she usually did. Raven would never say it aloud but I knew she loved Beastboy with all of her heart, not in a romantic way but in a sisterly kind of way. Beastboy was like the beloved younger sibling she never had but Raven had spent so long keeping her emotions tucked away that her only way of showing affection was through sarcasm and harsh criticism. I wasn't sure if Beastboy knew of how she felt about him but either way watching Raven sulk was sad. Deep down I wanted to just let Beastboy go and trust him when he said that this Jason person wasn't a threat but the 'Batman' in me wouldn't do that until I was 100% positive that he could be trusted.

/Raven's POV/

As we raced towards the city to fight whoever it was that was terrorizing the town I couldn't wash away the feelings of guilt. The last time I had felt this guilty was the time I had opened a portal for my evil father to come through and take over the earth and that situation was a lot worse than this. Even so I felt a horrible knotting in my stomach I had betrayed Beastboy and all in the name of wanting to protect him! I should have stayed out of it, should have just let it go but I couldn't. The day I had seen Garfield's memories the first thing I could think to do was run to him and comfort him, to tell him that what had happened those many years ago would never happen again but when I had looked into his eyes all I could do was tell him how sorry I was that I had even seen them.

The fact that he had never mentioned these things , the fact that there were memories that even he kept locked away in the dark recesses of his mind had made me feel as if I had done him a total injustice by even taking a peak no matter how involuntary it was.

"Raven watch out!" I barely had time to look up before I was struck down. I was disoriented for a bit and heard Starfire coming to my aid. "Raven are you ok?" she asked I looked up at her and nodded, she helped me up and I quickly regained my composure. It was Cinderblock that had struck me down I growled and lifted a car with my dark energy and slammed it into Cinderblocks face, I knew it would keep him down for long but that was payback for striking me when my guard was down!

As I joined the battle I noticed Nightwing wasn't attacking Cinderblock like Starfire, Cyborg and I, I scanned the area and found that he was currently in hand to hand combat with Slade. Out of all of our villains Slade was the most dangerous and most annoying of them all even when he 'died' he still found a way to come back. It had been a long time since we had battled with Slade the last we heard he was running several gangs in the city all of which were super powered! We'd fought them on many occasions and all of them weren't easy to defeat like Control Freak or Mad Mod. These gangs were 10 times more ruthless than most of the other villains and had no qualms against killing innocent civilians or us, but then what would you expect with Slade leading them.

((Back at Titans Tower Beastboy's POV))

This was extremely frustrating, I was bored and hungry not to mention the only 'person' I could talk to was in my head not to mention everything he said was extremely irritating.

I heard a loud bang coming from outside suddenly and then my doors swished open, I quickly got into a defensive position and readied myself for whoever had the gall to bust into the Tower.

"My, my long time no see….." It was Red X. Why he was breaking into the tower? Who's to say but he was a notorious thief and he always had an ulterior motive.

"What the hell are you doing here Red X, Here to steal something from Nightwing again?" he chuckled then proceeded to walk around the room.

"In a way." He answered simply.

"Then why the hell are you in my room?" I asked he didn't say anything for awhile and seemed to be staring at a CD collection of mine.

"I've come to free the Beast!" he said in a sarcastic and theatrical way, I growled and tried ignoring the comment.

"Stop toying with me, either you tell me why you're really here or I beat you into a bloody pulp!" he turned his attention from my CD collection and looked at me.

"My how violent we are, besides there is no need for such threats like I said I've come to free the beast so to speak, they've locked you in here right well you've got a choice you either come willingly with me….or I take you by force."

I scoffed and stared at him skeptically. "Not much of a choice now is it?" I sat down on my bed and contemplated his offer for a second. It was strange how at ease I was with the situation at hand. Here I was with one of Teen Titans most notorious enemies offering me 'freedom' although I knew better than to think he didn't have 'something' up his sleeve even so I felt that if it would get me out of this place and away from those 'assholes' that betrayed me then so be it, if this was the opportunity I had been waiting for then I wouldn't pass it up. Whatever Red X had in store for me I would deal with it later.

"Fine then, I'll come with you."

"So easy, you're not going to ask me why, or how I even knew you were on lock down?" he asked, and this time it was my turn to chuckle.

"All in good time, well are we leaving or what?"

He didn't say a word after that and just left the room expecting me to follow…and I did.


	6. An Offer you Can't Refuse

/**Yep I know another long awaited Chapter I could promise you next time it would be faster but then I'd be lying School has me swamped so I update them whenever I can I hope you like this one it seems a little too cliche for me but writers block ya know but not to worry more juicy drama to come there might even be a lemon in the next chapter stay tuned also I do not own Teen Titans and please Review/**

Robins POV

Two weeks, two long fucking weeks of not knowing where Beastboy was, his communicator and the tracking device in his clothing was gone so that left us scrounging around the city for any hint of him, any hint of green we could find. I knew it was dumb if he had escaped on his own he would make sure not to be seen he stuck out like a sore thumb! I called the Doom Patrol and they said they had received no form of communication from Beastboy let alone knew where he was. It was irritating to have Mento glare at me and lecture me about how I should have been watching him and taking care of him at all times, it was like listening to Batman's lectures only 10 times worse since Mento was just a brazen asshole who only thought he knew better than everyone else. It got so bad that we ended up screaming at each other eventually Rita came and ended the conversation saying that she'd keep us posted if they found anything. I was on edge and it was becoming increasingly difficult to try and find Beastboy and keep up with the constant attacks from random villains, eventually Cyborg ended up calling Titans East for help. After we had filled them in on the situation at hand they had graciously offered to handle our villain problem while we searched for Beastboy.

As we searched I had started to wonder if Slade had planned this and that maybe Beastboy had been kidnapped or worse had joined him, but Beastboy wouldn't join Slade would he? After all that he had done especially to Terra. Then there was trying to figure out who this Jason person was and that was a bust considering Beastboy constantly lied about his appearance whenever I would interrogate him but even so I had to take all his descriptions into consideration the only feature that he kept repeating was that he had shaggy black hair but If that was all I had to go on then I'd be bringing millions of people into questioning. I would lose sleep at night looking up every Jason in the area and some of them looked seedy but not one of them really stuck out to me as the Jason he was talking about. I doubted it would be one of the seedy characters anyway if Beastboy was willing to protect this person's identity than he had to look like someone trustworthy someone who didn't look too suspicious. I constantly pestered Raven for any clues she could give me anything from his past that might give this Jason person away but she vehemently refused and of course I knew why she was feeling guilty, I could slowly see her mask of indifference crumble the longer it took for us to find Beastboy, Starfire would sometimes express to me that Raven had been crying some nights and it made me feel bad that I had pestered her so often but something had to be done.

Beastboy Pov

Two weeks had gone by and I had found myself strapped to a lab chair, with bright fluorescent lights beaming down on me, it brought back memories, memories from a long time ago but I was neither angry or depressed as I sat there waiting to be subjected to even more tests. I had chosen to be there, I had willingly put myself in that seat, willingly let myself be strapped down. I closed my eyes and waited thinking of what led me to this decision in the first place.

_Two weeks ago…. _

_I remembered Red X and I had been running from the Titans Tower eventually we got far enough to slow down but he was leading me through dark alleyways and warehouse buildings I recognized this part of town of course this was where we had fought many of Slade's super powered gangs we even passed by a few of them but not one tried to attack me they all just smirked and chuckled like they knew a secret I didn't. It didn't take me long to realize that this had something to do with Slade and even though I knew that I kept following Red X curious about what Slade's plan was this was extremely dangerous and stupid of me but I was at point where I felt I had nothing to lose I couldn't go back to the Teen Titans they would only lock me away again and there was no way in hell I would go back to the Doom Patrol just to listen to Mento's incessant bitching, even if Rita was there I would never go back it would be like going from one prison to another._

"_We're here." Red X said and I noticed we stopped at one of the many warehouses in this district, this one seemed to be a little less run down than the others though. I glanced at Red X for a second before walking in and like every creepy, suspense movie I could hear the doors close on me from behind not to mention it was dark and Red X just conveniently disappeared but I didn't care soon Slade would show himself and 'make me an offer I couldn't refuse.' I walked further into the warehouse till I came across a room, I assumed it was some kind of office and I wasn't far from the truth when I walked in the room was quite nicely decorated from lavish furnishings to high tech equipment and in the center of the room I could see a man sitting in one of the sofa chairs his back was turned to me of course so I couldn't see his face but I could see light brown hair with streaks of gray grace his head. Then in the chair sitting across from the man was Slade himself, he looked up at me and gestured for me to come closer._

"_Welcome Beastboy it's been quite some time since we've seen each other, why not have a seat?" he said in that dark velvety voice of his but I merely stared at him and stood there. He chuckled and got up from his seat._

"_I have to say Beastboy I was more than a bit surprised you came so willingly, have the titans really been treating you so badly that you would come here without so much as a word of protest." He chuckled again and my eyes narrowed at him._

"_You've been spying on us have you?" I said._

"_I have, wasn't easy of course though but I after I saw how __**Robin**__ and the others we're treating you I thought to myself I had to do somet-"_

"_Stop it! You want something from me Slade so why don't you just tell me what it is, I'm sure it has something to do with me joining your __**cause**__." For a second Slade looked a bit shocked than he quickly regained his composure and circled me like a hungry vulture._

"_You've come a long way from the foolish 14 yr old boy I once fought against but then I always knew that there was more to you than meets the eye, so yes I want you to join my __**cause**__ as you so eloquently put it. I could make you strong Beastboy, with your powers and your Intel on the Teen titans we could rule this city with an iron fist."_

_I scoffed and I could see him tense up obviously taking that as in insult that I would dare scoff in his presence._

"_Sounds like Déjà vu all over again Slade didn't you learn anything from the Terra debacle besides I've fought against you many times and I know you only wish to control me like you did Terra and that isn't going to happen, I didn't come here just to be enslaved again so if this is all you have to sell me your wasting your time." I stared long and hard at him and he merely glared at me for awhile before he finally decided to speak._

"_You truly have grown haven't you Beastboy, I won't deny it you were right about my motives and I'm a little ashamed you figured me out so quickly, I must be getting old….But do you really think you can walk out on me now, your strong Beastboy but you won't be able to defeat me and everyone else I have stationed around."_

_He was right about that and I frowned at the thought I wouldn't be able to escape alive._

"_Your smarter than you let on Beastboy and you came here wondering what I had to offer and I offer you strength and once you help me defeat the Titans you will have your freedom guaranteed to you and so much more than that __**If**__ you help me defeat them Beastboy you will want for nothing…." I smirked, I wanted freedom everything else he would offer I didn't really care about but was this worth killing the titans over at one point I did care for them and one point I was in love with one of them, I was in love with Nightwing and part of me still had feelings for him even though what he did made my blood boil but just as Slade said I wouldn't be leaving here safely and it'd not like I would be able to refuse him, Slade was arrogant though and there were times when he would be way in over his head he helped Terra become stronger and he underestimated how strong she'd become and she brought him down not without consequence though but her life had not been lost she was still alive I knew…I saw. This offer for new found strength and his arrogance would have to be my trump card for now._

"_Fine Slade I will join you and bring down the titans and in return I will have my freedom." I said and if his mask hadn't have been there I'm sure he'd be smirking right about now._

"_Good now that that's taken care of I believe you've already met Professor Bernard Aldaine he'll be helping you reach your full potential." Slade chuckled low and dark and my skin grew cold as the man sitting down stood up and revealed himself._

"_Ma Petite Bête how I've missed you." There before me stood the man who haunted my dreams the man I had hoped never to see again._

_/"Master…" /_


	7. Plucked Petals

/First off I would like to say I'm sorry to everyone who has been reading, A lot has been going on lately and I won't make any promises on how often I'll be updating my story but I WILL try not to make you wait so long./

"Oh Honey bear wake up." It wasn't hard to mistake that voice, the mischievous tone the dark chuckle that followed after. I sighed I didn't really want to get up I just wanted to lay there at least for a little while longer but I knew if I did that he'd start getting impatient and an impatient Jason was the most annoying and perverted thing on earth. So with an irritated groan I got up. I didn't look at him initially, I just stared at the wall to pull myself together I had been so tired lately what with Slade's heinous training regimen and Professor Aldaine's experiments and sexual harassment it was a wonder how I ever got up at all.

"How's my green little lamb chop doing this fine evening?" Jason asked, I rolled my eyes at the nickname and looked at him. "How do you think I'm doing Jason I'm tired, what do you want and I swear if it doesn't have anything to do with Slade or that sick asshole I'm going to rip your fucking head off." I growled and of course like always he just answered me with an amused chuckle.

"Oh honey bear stop being so mean I come bearing gifts and food." I sighed and laid back down on the bed, he only did these things went he _wanted_ something. "Then set them on the table and get out, I told you I'm tired and I don't feel like _playing_ with you." I turned over with my back facing him I could tell that annoyed him I could hear his body tense up a bit.

"Come on Beastboy it's been a month I _need_ you." He said, the bed shifted and I could feel him crawling in and getting close to me, he lied down beside me and let his hand travel down my frame. I truly wasn't in the mood for this especially when Jason started acting like that. Jason was very charming but he could also be very vain, selfish, and possessive, when he started acting that way I almost regretted my decision in letting him take my virginity but at the time he was the lesser of two evils.

/_I had been with Slade for almost 6 months now and of course they weren't at all pleasant. I could deal with Slade being a vindictive asshole I already had to deal with one of those but that along with his __**advances**__ on me were disgustingly chilling. It was like dealing with two Professor Aldaine's and I hated it then and I hated now. They were so much like each other it was just downright creepy the only differences between them were strength, power, mindset, and approach. Unfortunately though I had to play them both, for whatever reason Aldaine was deliriously infatuated with me after all these years you would think he would have moved on to a new conquest but that was not the case, I should have made sure to kill him first when I escaped but that was another story entirely. Aldaine was insane but he was also a romantic of sorts he liked to think that we were lovers and I wasn't exactly sure what his fantasies of me were but it was easy to play along but most times I would let Douleur take over._

_Douleur although cold and nonchalant was the more submissive side of myself, if I were to let this side of myself fully take over he would let Aldaine and Slade do whatever they wanted with me. In the past few months I had learned to gain control over my personalities some of them anyway._

_Training with Slade was harsh and brutal and to make matters worse he had come up with a device that would keep from transforming so I was left fighting him in my more human form. He said that learn how to fight using both sides of myself would make me an unmatched opponent but it still didn't sit well with me usually when slade came up with devices like those they were meant to control but I didn't have much choice now that I was here. The first time I trained with him without using my powers was brutal to the point of damn near cruelty not only was I fighting and dodging his powerhouse moves I also had to keep from getting thrashed by his stupid drones but eventually I had improved. I had improved so much so in such a short amount of time Slade even praised me and after the praise, came the advances then after the advances, came the proposal. _

"_You have improved greatly in these past few months Beastboy I must say I'm quite proud, maybe I should've have recruited __**you**__ back then instead of Terra, you've advanced far more than she ever could." Slade said as he placed his hands on my shoulders slightly massaging them I groaned inwardly as it was one of those times Slade wanted to get 'frisky' for lack of a better word._

"_I believe I've told you before that your cynical flattery does nothing for me." The vibrations of his chuckling seemed to run through my body in a sickening way and his hands massaging and caressing me weren't much to be desired either. "So cold and yet oh so warm." It was all I could do to keep from throwing up his strong and forceful hands were no different than Aldaine's cold and creepy ones. _

"_Slade." I growled out in warning as he continued touching me. "I bet it would be a lot warmer inside you, tighter too." I could feel his breathe on the nape of my neck and I shivered, I couldn't take much more of him molesting me so I pushed him away but he only came right back un-phased and highly amused. _

"_Why so hesitant Beastboy I know Aldaine didn't get __**that far**__ with you, or did he?" I tried punching him but he quickly had me pinned against the wall. "Trust me that sick freak never got a chance just like __**you never will either!**__" I spat out and glared up into his eyes or rather eye and yet he still was amused with all of this as if we were playing some sick flirtatious game. My head was throbbing as Douleur was shouting at me to submit._

"_You seem to have forgotten who you're talking to, I'll always get what I want and if I want to thrust my cock into that tight ass of yours I will, but I think the sex would be more delightful if you would just come to me willingly, don't you think Beastboy?"_

"_I WILL NEVE-"I stopped as he placed a finger over my mouth to hush me._

"_Shhh, never say never Beastboy." He chuckled again and loosened his grip on me._

"_I know I can be quite cruel sometimes Beastboy but I am capable of being kind and I'm sure you would rather your __**first**__ time be pleasant so to be __**kind**__ I'll give you 3 days to come to your senses and to my bed and if you don't I will come get you myself." And with that he left._

_The next day I was inwardly panicking I couldn't leave, Slade of course made sure of that, and then there was also Aldaine still ready and waiting for me to come to him and seeing as how I was unable to transform there seemed to be no real option and at that I growled. The 3 days was just going to be more entertainment for Slade as a he watched me squirm only to be taken by him anyway whether I said Yes or No. Then just as I was ready to give up this losing fight Jason or rather Red X came back from a mission Slade sent him out on._

_That night he snuck into my room and we talked just about random things, dreams and wishes, likes and dislikes the present and the past just like we did before I came to be here and just like we did when he was here with me. It went without saying that over a few months we had grown closer. While Jason may have been a cold, calculating, selfish thief there was a side to him he seemed to only show me. The side that was human and normal everything I wanted to be, used to be but couldn't anymore and having him here like this was like having a light in darkness and it seemed like maybe I was the same to him but even so with all of his good qualities I couldn't ignore the bad ones the ones, the ones that had me inwardly screaming not to trust him but what other choice did I have he was the only one I __**could**__ trust if only somewhat so. _

"_Jason…..how much do you like me?"_

_He smirked a bit when I asked much to my annoyance but answered me nonetheless. _

"_Why I like you more than shiny things and ice cream and you KNOW how much I like both."_

_I sighed I hated when he started toying with me especially when I was being serious._

"_Here's a better question then…" I looked him straight in the eyes this seemed to somewhat get his attention._

"_How much do you want me?" his eyes widened in shock if only for a second and he didn't answer me right away. The longer he waited to answer me the more nervous I became I was practically handing myself over to him on a platter and he was taking his sweet and precious time to say yes or no! It was maddening!_

"_I definitely want you more than Slade does." He smirked but in his eyes was a thoughtfulness I let out a breathe that I had been holding for what seemed like hours._

"_So then you know?" he nodded his head and laughed at me a bit. _

"_I knew Slade was going to make a move on you long before you did."_

"_Thanks for the warning." I said sarcasm laced in my voice. I lied down on my bed and looked at him almost pleadingly for answer on what to do at this point I wasn't strong enough to keep Slade away and the thought of Slade taking away what little innocence I had left was chilling. _

_Jason smiled at me thoughtfully and leaned over to kiss me, it was a gentle short kiss and still enough to make me blush._

" _I don't want to give Slade what pure little part of me I have left, and I especially don't want Aldaine to have me after all he's done, but I-" I couldn't seem to finish what I was trying to say all of it was just too much and I felt trapped under the weight of pressure, gasping for breath. _

"_But you're also not sure if I should have you either, but yet I'm still the lesser of two evils so what choice do you have." Everything I had wanted to say had come out in Jason's voice and I was a little relieved but I still had not made a decision._

"_I know my actions in the past have kept you from fully trusting me, and you probably never should, but I will promise you that I would never take what you're about to give me for granted." What he said didn't much reassure me but I could tell there was a bit of sadness in his voice when he said that I should probably never trust him. _

'_Y-you sound so sure that I'll let you take my virginity." I blushed for it was the only thing I could think to say now with him over me looking at me the way he was._

"_What other choice do you have?" what he said was so matter of fact and devoid of emotion that it frightened me a little. My heart was pounding rapidly in my chest I knew what was about to happen but it was hard to accept. I shut my eyes tight and tried to hold back a whimper I was unsuccessful in holding in when I felt the bed shift and the sheets rustle as he bent down to kiss me again this time a lot more rough and lustful and before I knew it I found myself kissing back with abandon giving in to him and the feelings my body were being racked with. _

_I felt his hands and lips kiss and touch every part of my body, his touch felt like it sent shockwaves through my body, pleasurable ones that had me making noises I never made before. His touch felt that much more electric when he removed my clothing and I his. I couldn't hold back a blush though when seeing him naked and having his body flush against mine. I could feel every muscle that tensed or relaxed when I touched him and to feel his cock grind against me was so sinfully good it made my mind hazy. _

"_Jason..." I managed to whisper out as we kissed he moaned and ground against me again then pinned me to the bed. I blushed and looked away as he looked me over I felt embarrassed while he was tall, strong and handsome, I was small and unnatural looking, green skin, pointy ears and fangs and yet here he was kissing and touching me, It was a wonder why he wanted me at all, why anyone did._

"_Hey stop that." He said as he nipped my neck._

"_I know what you're thinking and I don't like when you think that way if I didn't think you were sexy and beautiful I wouldn't be here stark naked with a raging hard on about ready to pound you into the mattress." If I hadn't been blushing already I was definitely blushing now._

"_Jason I can't believe you, that's so embarrass- mmm" I sighed a little into the kiss, showing him that I was still annoyed but that was soon forgotten as he began kissing down my body stopping to kiss the inside of my thigh than the base of my cock I gasped as I felt my body shiver, I was so embarrassed that I started wriggling underneath him but he held my legs still as he licked up the base of my cock to the tip and finally taking me into his mouth. I moaned so loudly I was sure someone heard but what he was doing to me felt too good to care I gripped the sheets underneath me and arched off the bed trying to buck my hips but he kept me still and massaged the inside of my thighs making me writhe and moan like crazy. _

"_J-Jason I-I feel like I'm about to burst!" I managed to say as I clutched my hands in his hair. He started moaning and the vibrations coming from his throat drove me to the edge and back as I screamed pleasure coursing through my body. When I came down from my high I was breathless and dazed, I shivered when he released his mouth from my cock and I blushed furiously when I saw him lick his lips._

"_I-I'm sorry I didn't mean to!" he chuckled and nipped at my thigh making my cock twitch._

"_Don't worry about it." He said as he crawled up and kissed me on the lips I blushed at the taste it was weird tasting 'myself' but I didn't care to much as we continued kissing he stopped suddenly and started looking through my drawers for something he obviously found it and it was a bottle of lotion I watched him curiously as he squirted a large amount on his hands and fingers. Jason leaned down and kissed me and again and I jumped when I felt something cold and slimy lightly tease my hole._

"_This is going to be a little unpleasant for a minute but I promise it will feel good soon, are you ready?" I nodded hesitantly and squeezed my eyes shut when I felt his finger enter me, it wasn't exactly painful but it was unpleasant and it felt that way for awhile as he continued working his finger in me pushing it in and out I started to become use to the feeling when he added a second finger which made me hiss in pain, he started kissing and biting my neck to keep me from thinking about the pain, slowly started to subside but I screamed when he brushed his fingers against something inside me that was sending pleasurable waves up my body tenfold._

"_Oh God Jason!" I could feel him smirk against my neck as he continued thrusting his fingers into that spot, I hardly noticed when he added a third finger, every time he hit that spot I would writhe and moan, grinding against him desperately and just when I was about to reach another orgasm he pulled his fingers out much to my deep dismay, I whimpered and pouted at him wondering why he stopped, he chuckled and kissed my neck again. _

"_Don't worry this is just the preview." After saying that he lifted my legs up and placed them over his shoulders he coated his cock with the lotion again placing a generous amount and lightly pressed himself against me. I felt my nerves coming back tenfold and I was on the verge of panicking._

"_We don't have to-"_

"_No! I want too, I just I'm a little nervous." I could see concern in his eyes as he leaned down and placed a chaste kiss on my lips. _

"_Are you sure you're ready?" he asked. I let out a deep breath and nodded calming my nerves a bit; I wrapped my arms around his neck and kiss him. Taking that as the go ahead and slowly started to push into me and if it wasn't for him kissing me I would have been screaming bloody murder, him pushing into me felt like I was being ripped open I dug my nails into his shoulders and hot tears started to fall from my eyes when he was finally sheathed inside me he stopped and placed light kisses all over my face. It took awhile but I was starting to get used to Jason being inside me so I ground my hips against him which elicited the sexiest moan I've ever heard from him. _

_He started thrusting inside me slowly and while there was pain I could still feel pleasure and just like before when he was thrusting his fingers inside me I felt his cock hit that spot that drove me mad again and I scream. _

"_Ah! Jason more!" I begged as I bucked my hips into him, he groaned and pinned my hands by my sides and started thrusting hard and slow inside me speeding up than slowing down it was driving me crazy. I moaned and screamed his name more times than I can count, digging my nails into his hands as he held me down._

"_Jason! Faster please!?" I screamed out writhing under him wildly as he thrust hard and slow into me. His torture was becoming too much and using strength I didn't know I had I pushed up and pinned him to the bed riding him wildly._

"_OH FUCK JASON!" I didn't usually curse but feeling him so deep inside me hitting that spot keeping my composure was hard to do as he thrust up into me, I continued to ride him but I felt myself slowing down, grinding on him slowly._

"_Oh no I don't think so!" Suddenly I felt him lift me up and my back slam against the wall as he thrust up into me hard and fast again I left long deep scratches down his back as I felt myself getting close to an orgasm again._

"_Jason!" I screamed his name one last time as I came riding out my orgasm on his cock, when I came back down I laid my head on his shoulder completely spent._

"_That was….."_

"_I hope you don't think it's over." He said I looked at him slightly shocked I didn't think was I going to be able to take much more. _

"_What, but I?"_

"_You've come twice, I haven't come at all and I'm not gonna stop screwing you till you pass out."_

"_J-JASON! AH!" _

/End scene! So how was my first sex scene be gentle! Lol and one again I am sooooo sorry I didn't get this chapter to you until now I'll try not to wait so long in between. Thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed please keep reviewing!/


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